Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Faye Walter: The Next Bachelorette?

My mom thinks I should go on ABC's hit dating/proposal/breakup show

Mom, I'm pretty sure you just want a grandchild. First of all, I'm not even your oldest. The pressure should be on Morgan. She is halfway to fifty. Secondly, I could totally give you a grandchild without a Bachelor, if that's what you want. But that's not the way we do it here. We're traditional. First comes love, then comes marriage, then, after a few years of spending our money on ourselves, will come Faye with a baby carriage.

Also, I don't think I'm interesting enough for the show. (And by interesting, I mean tall and blonde.)

Oh, and I'm kind of awkward. But, I guess awkward has paid off in the past.

Plus there's that little thing about me being outspoken. I don't know if I could handle being around 24 catty females...and that storyline has already happened.

Who's to say I'd even like the guy, anyway? I am seriously very picky.

"But you owe me a grandchild." 

Yes, mom. Yes, I know. I do. And what better way to achieve that than to humiliate myself on national television?

Okay, okay...sign me up!

Thursday, December 16, 2010

People Years: Update

My favorite post to date is definitely People Years.

It's about one of the best boys that has ever lived. If you didn't read it, check it out. Now. I'll wait.....

Okay, now that you're all caught up about my sweet Toby, I can tell you that tomorrow he would have turned 17! Yes, would have. Shortly after I wrote that post, we had to put him down. It was a heartbreaking decision, but it had to be done. 

Now, of course, he's in doggy heaven! He lived such a long and happy life...I mean, he was almost 17! It really puts it into perspective when I think that he was born when I was 5 and I'll be 23 soon. Insane! 

He was the best dog ever. I doubt any dog could ever replace him. 

And I know you're all wondering... Yes. We had him cremated. Well, Mom had him cremated. But trust me...just be relieved that she didn't have him stuffed.

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Christmas Cheer - Ingram Hill Style

Christmas is 10 days away...and I don't have the Christmas cheer, yet. 

Possibly because I'm only about 3% done with my Christmas shopping. Or maybe it's because I'm not a fan of Christmas music? Yeah. I said it. I don't like Christmas music. Morgan always makes us listen to it during Thanksgiving dinner, but she wasn't in attendance this year...so other than a song or two, I haven't listened to it at all.

Well, here's some Christmas music even I can tolerate...thanks to my favorites.

I can feel the Christmas Cheer coming on already. Can't you?

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

What's Your Sign?

I've never been one to really read horoscopes. I'll glance at my love horoscope when I happen to flip through Cosmo (which isn't very often...and which might be why I'm single), but never really look into them.

Lately, I've been scrolling through @ZodiacFacts on Twitter to see what they have to say about my sign, Aquarius. Wowza. I am definitely an Aquarius.

Aquarians don't mind being asked to do something but they resent being told to do it.

As an Aquarius when under emotional pressure, you tend to freeze up and establish a distance.

As an Aquarius your individuality is your number one priority.

The worst quality of an Aquarius is argumentativeness.

Aquarians are not really good with handling emotions.

The spot-on statements really piqued my interest, so I did a little research.

Every single fact I read about the typical Aquarius sounds like it was written about me, personally.

An Aquarius often likes to be alone but not for morbid reasons. They use solitude to concentrate on new ideas and to make important decisions.

Unconventional and outspoken, Aquarius is the rebel of the Zodiac.

Aquarius needs a partner who is her intellectual equal and who is willing to provide freedom and space.

An Aquarius doesn't give people the chance to get too close to them too easily.

The facts go on and on.

I got a little freaked out when I read this statement on astrology-online:

As Aquarius is said to govern the legs from knees to ankles and the circulation of blood, its natives are susceptible to ailments particularly in the legs and ankles, such as cramps.

So my legs suck because I was born under a certain Zodiac sign? Thanks a lot Mom and Dad.

My horoscope for today says:

Curb your excessive tendency to spend money on things that are short-time enjoyment. Save some of this money for a real New Year's fling, or a special gift.

I do have that tendency. And I am still trying to decide what to do for New Year's....

Do you get into astrology? What does your sign say about you?

Monday, December 13, 2010

Music Monday Confession

The Beatles..."one of the most commercially successful and critically acclaimed acts in the history of popular music." Yes. This is true. But I have a confession. I like Beatles covers a lot more than I like The Beatles. Check out my favorites.

What's your favorite Beatles cover?

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Love and Other Drugs and Taylor Swift

I saw Love and Other Drugs the other night. It's such a good story. It will make you laugh; it may make you cry. It left me feeling lots of different emotions.

But mostly, it left me feeling an even bigger hatred for Taylor Swift than ever before. I've never liked her music. I don't like her cheesy songs about guys who broke her heart. I don't like her hair. I don't like her. Period.

I looked up the lyrics to "Dear John" because it's supposedly about John Mayer and I was curious. I couldn't go so far as to actually listen to it, so I read the lyrics. Ummm...Taylor. You pretty much just told the world (or those who listen to your music) that John Mayer "hit it and quit it" as some would say. 

"Dear John,
I see it all now that you're gone
Don't you think I was too young to be messed with?
The girl in the dress,
cried the whole way home.
I should've known"

Yeah, ya slut. Maybe you shouldn't have slept with him.

Anyway. My point. If Taylor Swift is really dating Jake Gyllenhaal and it's not some sort of weird publicity stunt...then I officially hate her. 

Wonder what cheesy song she'll write next? Heartbreak Jake?

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Your Favorite Christmas Special

The first thing I do when I get to work every morning is check my e-mail read the top 5 stories on msn.com.

In fact, just this morning I read all about John Lennon because it's the 30 year anniversary of his death. And I learned what not to wear to holiday office parties.

But yesterday, I read What Your Favorite Christmas Special Says About You. Whether you're a fan of How the Grinch Stole Christmas or Frosty the Snowman or even Shrek the Halls, this article will tell you a little about yourself. Mine was about 98% accurate.

How the Grinch Stole Christmas


"Like the Grinch, your disdain for the suburban way of life is palpable, but a touch insincere. For while you swear you've never set foot into a Pottery Barn or a Home Depot, you secretly resent the happiness of middle-class nesters and wish you, too, could buy matching throw pillows on the Internet instead of tracking them down at a vintage furniture store three states away. You detest Christmas music, but not enough to commit Grinch-like crime. You wouldn't be caught dead using multicolored Christmas lights or serving store-bought eggnog--it's organic and homemade, or it's nothing. You also despise public displays of holiday spirit. But unlike the Grinch, whose heart was two sizes too small, your heart is a normal size, though you don't wear it on your sleeve, and you give to charities generously, but anonymously. You're a cat person."

Pottery barn? I'll go antiquing. Christmas music? Turn that off. (Although I did play a couple songs from Hanson's Snowed In to try to get in the spirit this morning.) Multi-colored lights? Hell no. But let me be clear, here...I am a dog person. I don't hate cats...but I'm a dog person, 100%.

Find out what your favorite holiday special says about you HERE.

Thursday, December 2, 2010

You Might Be a Hipster If...

According to my roommate, there is a checklist of 5 things that make you a hipster. If you meet one or two, you're okay. Three or four...borderline. But all five? You're a hipster.

The List:
1. You own (and wear regularly) black skinny jeans.
2. You blog. 
3. You tweet. A lot.
4. You listen to obscure music.
5. You're "writing a book".

Well, well. Let me see.

✓ love my black skinnies
✓ i blog. obviously.
✓ guilty. @wfayew
✓ obscure music is definitely my favorite.
✓ i'm actually in the middle of 3 different ideas.

But. I'm not a hipster. Why? Because there's one fact about me that cancels out all the rest.

I. Love. Britney. Spears.

Love her. Always have and always will. And today is her birthday! In honor of her birthday, I'm listening to all Britney all day. I suggest you do the same. 

Happy birthday Brit!