Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Faye Walter: The Next Bachelorette?

My mom thinks I should go on ABC's hit dating/proposal/breakup show

Mom, I'm pretty sure you just want a grandchild. First of all, I'm not even your oldest. The pressure should be on Morgan. She is halfway to fifty. Secondly, I could totally give you a grandchild without a Bachelor, if that's what you want. But that's not the way we do it here. We're traditional. First comes love, then comes marriage, then, after a few years of spending our money on ourselves, will come Faye with a baby carriage.

Also, I don't think I'm interesting enough for the show. (And by interesting, I mean tall and blonde.)

Oh, and I'm kind of awkward. But, I guess awkward has paid off in the past.

Plus there's that little thing about me being outspoken. I don't know if I could handle being around 24 catty females...and that storyline has already happened.

Who's to say I'd even like the guy, anyway? I am seriously very picky.

"But you owe me a grandchild." 

Yes, mom. Yes, I know. I do. And what better way to achieve that than to humiliate myself on national television?

Okay, okay...sign me up!


  1. Do you think they'd let you blog from the mansion? Or the bus? Or wherever the hell they keep them this year?

  2. Hahahahaha! This cracked me up so much!

    Oh! And I found your blog through location central and I love it so I thought I'd say hi. :)

  3. I love those trashy reality shows! I think the criteria for getting on one of them is that you have a maximum of 5 brain cells, any more than 5 and you are clearly are a genius in reality show world. Judging by your blog you have way more than 5!!!

  4. Soooomehow a few months ago I happened upon this excellent blog of yours. Love following it for so many reasons. I'm from Fargo,ND and it is hilarious reading your writing because you are so different than what I picture a "southern gal" to be like. Keep writing, I'll keep reading! (And if continue to give excellent musical tips, I'll read more) Your taste on bachelors is not bad either...

  5. Um, is that Chris from Ali's season? I'd go to Maine (or was it Massachusettes?) just to look at him! LOL

    I think it'd be fun to be on the show-plus watching the audition tapes on You Tube are pretty sweet LOL