Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Ted Drugged Me

I'm single. Obviously. And my ex boyfriend just got engaged last weekend...on the beach. My other ex boyfriend is getting married next weekend...also, on the beach. (I think I'm slightly more jealous about the beach part.) Oh, and both girls have the same name. What is this? A low budget rom com? No. Because it is neither romantic nor funny. (It is kind of funny.)

Honestly, those guys were not "the one" for me and I know it. (Neither of them had the your/you're down.)

But really.

Lately (just for the past week) my thoughts have been consumed by things like being single and looking for love and catching bouquets and cuddling. Cuddling? I don't even like to cuddle (most of the time). Who am I?

I've never been a sappy "looking for love" girl. Seriously, who drugged me? I know who it was. Ted Mosby. (I've been watching How I Met Your Mother like crazy lately.) Ted is desperate to find love and will stop at nothing to make it happen.

Yeah...that's just not me. It'll happen when it happens.

In the meantime, know a hot (or even mildly attractive) single guy that wants to take me to dinner? I do get hungry.

Monday, May 23, 2011

If I Can't Have Kurt Cobain...

I might as well have someone who appreciates him as much as I do.


Oh. I can't have Matthew Gray Gubler either? Whatever, I can still Google image search him, follow his tweets, and watch 83,276 episodes of Criminal Minds on Ion and A&E...daily.



Long, dark hair.

I totally have a type.

Plus, he's so weird creative. And I love weird creative.

[Warning: clicking on the above link will take you to MGG's website. Strange sounds will soon begin to flow out of your speakers. Don't even think about visiting if you can't turn your volume up and enjoy the weirdness creativity.]

Linking up here.

Thursday, May 19, 2011

Hair Strippers

So, hair Strippers are bad for you. I know you're thinking, "Hair strippers? They take off all their clothes and dance on a barber pole, right?"

No. And they don't cut your hair while stripping, either.

Hair strippers remove dye from your hair using all kinds of crazy chemicals. Sounds good, right? No. 

I've always darkened my hair. Recently, I decided I didn't want it dark anymore. And I didn't want to wait for it to grow out. And I definitely didn't want to use a hair stripper. So I asked my knowledgeable friend Google what I should do. And you know what he said?

Head and Shoulders

You're not supposed to use Head and Shoulders if you color your hair because why? Because it removes the color. Three weeks of this stuff and my hair is back to its natural color. A nice, medium brown. 

Now, I think I wanna go lighter. Should I?

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Something Borrowed

Emily Giffin's Something Borrowed is one of my favorite books. I remember when I read it, I never wanted to put it down. (It was my first trip to Mardi Gras and I considered not going out so I could stay in and finish it.) I was so wrapped up in the story. The characters were all so likable (minus Darcy, of course). And, it was just great. It made me laugh, it made me cry, it made me hope. And the movie did the same.

I wasn't thrilled about the casting of Kate Hudson, but she was okay. I thought everyone else was cast wonderfully. Ginnifer Goodwin was lovable as Rachel. Collin Egglesfield was dreamy as Dex. And John Krasinski was absolutely perfect as Ethan. Spot on. Wonderful. He definitely stole the show. 

Not only was he completely hilarious...

...but he was also the perfect friend.

Do yourself a favor. Read the book and see the movie.

And...make yourself happy. Do something. Because if you pass up an opportunity, you might miss out on the chance of a lifetime.

Friday, May 6, 2011

Happy Birthday Linds!

For the past four years, we've had to celebrate Lindsay's birthday by studying for finals...but not this year! This year we're college we're both at work. (Seriously. It's really not that glamorous. If you're in school, stay as long as you can!)

But anyway, Happy Birthday to my dear friend Lindsay!

Celebrating my 20th birthday! Babies.

Kappa Delta Crush party - sophomore year
The summer we lived together!
KD bid day - junior year
KD Fall Formal - junior year
Kappa Delta Crawfish - junior year

KD Bid Day - senior year

KD pref - senior year

My 22nd!

Sushi date!

Kappa Delta Alumni Wine & Cheese last week.

Lindsay and I met freshman year and I'm proud to say we were friends throughout our entire college experience...and still! We both got jobs in Oxford after graduation and we meet for lunch at least once a week. (Usually at my favorite place.) Love her!

Thursday, May 5, 2011

Cinco de Tequila

In honor of Cinco de Mayo, I'm going to share with you a little story about why my good friend doesn't drink tequila...any more.

Let us go back to sophomore year of college. It was a weekend (or it could have been any old night of the week. That didn't matter.) and we were going to have a little house party. Brad lived in a complex called High Pointe. The condo he lived in was 3 levels, kind of. Let me explain. When you open the front door, you are presented with a staircase. If you walk up the stairs, you're on the main level which consists of a living room, kitchen, and two bedrooms and bathrooms. To get to the third bed/bath, there's another set of stairs. This floor plan will come in handy later.

So, Brad had a few people over. Music was blaring. People were dancing. Drinks were being poured. Shots were being taken. Shots. Tequila shots. Brad had these special edition Ole Miss shot glasses that were really a shot and a half sized. (It is Ole Miss ladies and gents.) So friend decided she wanted tequila shots. Yes, shots. So she took two. She doesn't like people watching her take shots, so she turned around for each. When she turned back, Holly taunted her with a "I bet you won't take another". And she did. This continued until she had taken 8 of these shot-and-a-half-shots. That's 12 shots if you're bad at fractions. Friend was feeling good. And looking good, might I add. She was wearing a little red dress she borrowed from our friend Whitney and man...

Anyway, a large group (friend included) decided to go across the street to another house party. "Across the street" actually meant out of the complex, across the street into a subdivision, and across another street, but for story purposes, we'll just say "across the street". There were a lot of people at this house party. Friend was introducing herself to everyone (most of whom she already knew) by telling them words that rhymed with her name. She drank a beer and then sat down in a recliner. 

The next thing that happened looked kind of like this:

Old Faithful
She exploded. She threw up into the air and all over herself. All over that hot red dress. All in her hair. All over the recliner. Everywhere.

Toni took her into the hall bathroom to try to clean her up. Being the total mother/babysitter/savior she is, she apologized to the guys (who said "aww no big deal, someone peed on it last weekend), rounded up those of us who were ready to go back across the street, and took friend back to Brad's.

Toni had to carry her up the first flight of stairs. When we all walked in, Brad could do nothing but laugh. He probably muttered an "I told you so", too. Toni ran a bath and told friend to strip down and get in. Friend, who always insists she can "do it myself" when she's drunk, insisted just that. Toni came back to check on her when she said she was done. Her hair wasn't even wet. She had just splashed around in the water for 10 minutes. When she tried to get out, Toni held her down and washed her hair for her. Finally, she was handed some shorts and a tshirt (which she put on backwards) and was told to get in bed upstairs.

Not happening. Toni had to carry her up the other set of stairs to the bedroom and put her in bed. When they reached the top of the stairs, she flailed a little and Toni dropped her. Nice.

And that my friends, is why friend...okay, who am I kidding? I...that is why I never drink tequila.

I woke up the next morning with limited memory and a pounding headache. Luckily, my friends tell the story so vividly (and so often) that I feel like I was there...mentally.

Just so I don't feel too bad about myself, another friend of ours (male friend) not only peed in the floor that night...he also peed in the sink. Thank you.

Do you stay away from certain drinks once you've had a bad experience? 

(I also don't drink J├Ąger, vodka tonic, rumplemintz, etc..... I might run out soon.)

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Snooki...sans poof.

Does Snooki still even sport that awful poof? 

I've never even watched an episode of Jersey Shore, but I do watch television/have Twitter/know I know enough. (Although I wish I'd never heard the word "smush". Sick.)

I think I remember seeing an interview with Snooki after her book was released (yeah, I'm laughing, too) where she said she wakes up in a garbage can once a month.

She's short. I'm short. She's tan. I'm tan (granted, mine is more golden-brown than orange). She's a mess. I, ladies and gentlemen, am a mess.

Thankfully, I have amazing friends that prevent me from waking up in garbage cans, or even worse...a stranger's bed/basement/bathtub full of ice.

Three times (count them 1-2-3) in the past three months, I have had nights where if it had not been for my amazing friends...I probably would have woken up in, about, or around a garbage can. Three times in three months...that is, on average, once a month.

Am I Snooki? 

So I just want to say a quick thank you to all of my friends who have my back when I drink a little too much in heels that are a little too tall and have to leave be escorted out of the bar a little too early. Thank you for making sure I get home safely with minimal injuries...and with my panties. Usually.*

*Kidding by "usually". Now, you can take it to mean either always or never. Your choice.